none of your business [entries|friends|calendar] garrett flint [ userinfo | insanejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | insanejournal calendar ]

twenty-three. 15 may 2023. [15 May 2012|06:06pm] Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team. In case you haven't heard me screaming it out at our practises over the past week, let this serve as a written record: WINNING OR LOSING THE NEXT MATCH DOES NOT MATTER. What does matter is making absolutely certain that we score AT LEAST 300 POINTS. Since the Chasers and the Seeker are the only positions that are able to score points, that means an unduly large part of the burden falls on the shoulders of Goldstein the female, Longbottom, Potter, and myself—don't whinge, train. Potter, don't catch the Snitch unless we've scored at least 150 points. MacFusty and Wood, target the Salem Keeper and Beaters, since they're the ones who could get in the way of scoring—I suppose you should target the Seeker, too. Weasley, as soon as you block a goal, get that Quaffle immediatelyback in play to one of our Chasers. And let me know right the fuck now if you are going to choke, because I will not have that shit. We deserve to go to the final, and I won't have you ruin it like Pye because you can't handle the pressure. A four-foot essay on whatshisname's theory of Experimental Charms the week before the biggest Quidditch match of my life? Swilt is out of his fucking mind if he thinks that's happening. Anyone interested in assisting the Captain? 7 comments|post comment

twenty-two. 27 april 2023. [backdated] [30 Apr 2012|08:52am] Why does life suck so much? It's just hit me this week how...I don't know, incredibly pointless it all is. We're born through blood and screams, we spend countless hours clawing our way to whatever highest point we can reach, knowing all the while we'll never make it to the top; there's always someone or something that'll be ahead of us and just out of reach. We're miserable as we experience people moulding us into the person they think we should be, telling us we're too this or not enough that, to try harder and be better, and so we hate ourselves. And then, eventually, we die, and it just ends. Please, tell me, what is the fucking point? 44 comments|post comment

twenty-one. 13 april 2023. [13 Apr 2012|12:26pm] Apparently I have—or had—an Aunt Mildred. First of all, what the hell kind of parent names their child Mildred? I'm guessing you can bet about how old Aunt Mildred is. Or was, when she died last week and left my dad a bunch of old-ass, dusty, nasty furniture which she cleverly called "family heirlooms" so we would have to keep them. That's right, she was like 284 (okay, I'm exaggerating, she was only 103, which is still too damn old). I am allegedly supposed to have met her when I was like 3, but like I remember that. Apparently there's a bunch of old dress robes and jewellery and shit too—Logan was blathering on about antique perfume and potion phials? I swear to fucking Merlin I don't understand women. But what is pretty cool is that now I have a house-elf. I mean, we have a house-elf, but when my dad goes it'll pass to me, so that technically makes her mine. Apparently Dad's grandparents had one, but she was pretty old and died before she could be passed along to my granddad. I wonder how long they live? Anyway, I'll enjoy being waited upon hand and foot, that's for sure. Gotta give her a few lessons on how to properly take care of the new broom models, though—these aren't the old Comet 140s, Bertie. Getting serious for a second, it's actually kind of sad that this old woman bit the big one and had no one except random family she hadn't seen in 15 years to leave her stuff to. She probably died in her sleep or something and if it hadn't been for her house-elf, no one would have realised it until a week later. Chalk that up to the 'reasons house-elves are a good idea' list. Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team. Just so there's not questions about "is it going to happen", "is it not going to happen," let's get one thing clear: I am 95% positive that Witch Weekly will run a gossip post about Hogwarts and Bo-however-the-fuck-you-spell-it students before our game next week. Prepare yourselves. It might be true. They might have pulled it out of your mother's left asshole. DO NOT LET IT THROW YOU. Arm yourself, so it can slide right off. Because I do not want to lose to the Frenchies again. 50 comments|post comment

twenty. 20 march 2023. [20 Mar 2012|10:27pm] Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team Anyone who went home for break, we're having a few practises to keep on top of our form. First one is Thursday. We'll meet at my place in London and go to an abandoned warehouse I use to practise. Anyone who'll have trouble getting here otherwise, let me know so I can arrange a portkey. Oh, and Towler, welcome aboard. Now get to work. [added later] Spring break. Alcohol. Women. No fucking classes. What more could one want? 26 comments|post comment

nineteen. 28 february 2023. [28 Feb 2012|06:32pm] Warded to the Hogwarts Team. This is all I'm going to say on the issue. Pye did exactly what you never do: abandoned her team when she was needed, motivated by selfishness. Betrayal isn't even beginning to scratch the surface of that, and I frankly have no time or energy to devote to people who are willing to throw away not only their futures, but their team's chances on a whim. I'm sick to fucking death of being the team that has the drama, the team who is cracking internally, the team who is always consumed with inner conflict. That is being outlawed right the fuck now. If you have doubts about yourself and your abilities, go train fucking harder. If you have doubts about your relationship with your teammates, bring it up to them and scream at each other in private until the issue is resolved. If you have doubts about my leadership abilities or methods, zip your fucking lip. And IF you think there's even the slightest chance that you might pull what Pye just pulled on this team, do it now and spare us all later drama. By staying, you're agreeing that you're in this thing until the end and that you will think about your teammates before you think about yourself. NOW, I never want to hear Pye's name said in my presence or see it in a ward to this team/me again. Warded to Corrie Pye. You are a sorry excuse for a human being, let alone a witch or a Quidditch player. 20 comments|post comment

eighteen. 25 february 2023. [25 Feb 2012|10:34pm] It's crying. It won't shut up, what do I do? 25 comments|post comment

seventeen. 2 february 2023. [02 Feb 2012|05:29pm] Warded to Elliot How late are you up for training? We'll fly in the Forest if we have to. Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team For those of you who don't know, Eddie fucking splinched herself and can't play Saturday. Elliot is filling in. I'm on my way to the pitch now to start training her. We can use as many of you as can spare whatever other plans you had for this evening. Ed, fucking we all hope you're okay, and we'll check on you in a bit, but we need to practise right now. So don't be mad if you wake up and no one is by your sick bed. Warded to Eddie And for fuck's sake, mend quickly. Durmstrang is in two weeks. I'm trying not to say that I'm going to kill you. But. 39 comments|post comment

sixteen. 1 february 2023. [01 Feb 2012|01:48pm] Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team So I have something I'd like to practise this evening. Since my main concern about romantic relationships was that you lose focus during games, I may have a solution, but I want to test it before we change our pre-game ritual. Larissa Samuels suggested we look into Occlumency techniques intended to clear your mind, and I thought that was a good suggestion. She's sent me a bunch of stuff on it; are you open to testing it out tonight? Warded to Avery Can I talk to you? [EDIT: Added later] Warded to Penny Pen, can you come do a translation spell for me? 54 comments|post comment

fifteen. 28 january 2023. [28 Jan 2012|11:06pm] Really? Why do we need a club for wankers? Don't we already have Gryffindor dormitories? Warded to Ava Did you find out about Beery? Warded to Avery How're things going with Malfoy? Warded to Scorpius I do hope you're treating Avery well. Warded to Slytherins Make sure someone tells the Bloody Baron to harass anyone who tries to get a picture with him, yeah? Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team Pair yourselves up. We're having another team-building activity this weekend. On my order this time. And no, you don't have a choice. You're doing a scavenger hunt (yes, MacFusty, you too), and I'll distribute the self-developing disposable cameras. ( the list ) 70 comments|post comment

fourteen. 14 january 2023. [14 Jan 2012|11:34pm] It's fucking hysterical how jealous everyone is that the Hogwarts Quid team gets to break curfew. Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team. Now that I have stolen my journal back, I have one thing that deserves writing: Corner, this is all your fucking fault. You will be doing so many laps tomorrow at practise you will be unable to stand for the rest of the fucking week. As a second note, listen to Potter, no public comments from the rest of you unless they're giving the finger to the rest of those fuckers. And as a third. I'm fucking hungry. Let's raid the kitchen. 41 comments|post comment

thirteen. 10 january 2023. [10 Jan 2012|09:10am] Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team Well. Since someone threw a hissy fit and complained to McCormack, I have been informed that I am not allowed to dictate your personal lives, and that only the coach gets that privilege. Fucking A, Corner and your courting. She alluded to some sort of mandatory bonding activity Please be certain of several things. As a member of this team, it ought to be your first priority. There are a lot of people who would fucking saw off their bollocks to be a member of this team and to have this opportunity. Even if you don't plan on going into professional Quidditch, a good number of your teammates do, and you owe it to them to put your heart and soul into every match—which is exceedingly difficult if your heart, mind, and genitals are even partially pointed in another direction. I am not saying that I don't believe in you, I am not saying that I think you're shit. I don't want you getting complacent simply because we've done well up until this point. And if Merlin-be-damned teenage hormones give us our first loss, I will lose my shit. Also, Weasley, I have no idea how me thinking that the Russian he-man was trying to distract you caused you to lose your confidence, but please, enlighten me. So. Who here really doesn't know how people fuck? 104 comments|post comment

twelve. 2 january 2023. [03 Jan 2012|12:27am] Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team. After careful consideration, I have made a decision. Romantic relationships, dates, hookups, and what-have-you are hereby banned for all members of the team for the duration of the Tournament. 36 comments|post comment

eleven. 7 december 2022. [07 Dec 2011|09:11pm] Warded to Jeremiah Cheers, mate. Share some? 1 comment|post comment

ten. 2 december 2022. [02 Dec 2011|12:53pm] Warded to the Hogwarts Quidditch Team I am seriously considering banning all members of this team from romantic relationships/encounters/entanglements/feelings. This is getting ridiculous. Other people are preying on it, and you can bet your asses Durmstrang has taken notice and are trying to figure out how to exploit it. So snap the fuck out of it. Also, decent dinner and bed early tonight. We want to be up late celebrating tomorrow, not running drills. Warded to Hogwarts Students By now all Hogwarts students should have had ample opportunity to acquire all kinds of shit in purple. Can we please flood the stands tomorrow and exploit our home pitch advantage for all it's worth? 51 comments|post comment

nine. 28 november 2022. [28 Nov 2011|08:49pm] Warded to Corrie Pye Where were you at lunch? And what the fuck happened at breakfast? Warded to Eddie Longbottom The fuck is wrong with Pye? 32 comments|post comment

eight. 20 november 2022. [20 Nov 2011|10:26am] Hawley. I don't think I properly thanked you for those biscuits, but they were fucking fabulous. As evidenced by the fact that I ate all six of them in about two minutes. The rest of you? Stop telling people what to do. It's really fucking aggravating. Oh, and nice match yesterday. I appreciate a good game, particularly when the next one is going to be such a blowout. Smith, I'm asking your sister to the Warbeck thing. Younger Smith, want to be my date? Ava. Did you end up going to the game? 34 comments|post comment

seven. 5 november 2022. [05 Nov 2011|11:02am] It is time to party, Hogwarts. Warded to the Hogwarts Team Words can't express. We could have played better--we could always have played better--but I am really pleased with you all. Cheers. Really, nice work. Tomorrow, it's back to practicing hard and strong, but tonight--tonight we celebrate. Warded to Eddie Brilliant. You were brilliant. Warded to Corrie Your passes were stellar. Really. Warded to Chase FUCK YES 29 comments|post comment

six. 3 november 2022. [03 Nov 2011|09:49am] Warded to Avery. Avery. Is there a wizarding plant that causes an itchy rash if you touch it? Preferably an unsightly rash? 15 comments|post comment

five. 26 october 2022. [26 Oct 2011|09:16am] WHO. 72 comments|post comment

four. 21 october 2022. [21 Oct 2011|10:16pm] I don't believe in luck. Beauxbatons, Durmstrang, I'm anticipating a good match, assuming you play up to your capabilities. Hogwarts Team. Eyes and ears everywhere tomorrow, team. We have the advantage of knowing what to expect going into our first match; let's not squander it. 28 comments|post comment

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